January 2011
65 posts
1 tag
oh dear. new years eve in minneapolis is not a gigantic party. here is my evening, in a nutshell:
watching super old episodes of “the office”
drinkin’ heineken
doing the drunken equivalent of telling everyone I LOVE YOUUUUUUUU on jezebel.com
loving life
getting excited about the mall of america tomorrow!
December 2010
53 posts
yo.
next time i try to drunkenly use tumblr to write about my escapades i hope it crashes because DAMN. hot mess.
RE: CALIFORNIA PSYCHICS
Chanel is like my personal hero right now. Even if it’s total BS it was exactly what I needed to hear because she told me things that I already knew I needed to do.
WHY DIDN’T I DO THIS EARLIER???
OMGZ
signing up for a psychic reading over the phone.
FROM CALIFORNIA PSYCHICS.
i am drunk and crazy. totes worth it. lifetime goal.
notawafflefactory asked: I just want you to know that your portrait photo is crazy sexy. Like, I may take you up on that whisky challenge.
OH MY GOD
sometimes i forget i had a second life where i met a dude on myspace and his name was adam and we dated until he got too attached for a senior in high school and i got weirded out. i realized he existed this very evening.
dear wine and vodka sours, you are making me make real weird facebook decisions.
I LOVE MILA KUNIS
AND I’ON EVEN CURR WHAT YOU SAY.
(partially influenced by wine and a vodka sour. BUT ONLY PARTIALLY)
last night
i had a really really involved zombie dream. before the attack i was at a random lake somewhere (where i guess my family had adjoining apartments) in the water on a floating thing with a really sexy guy with no name and we were hooking up but he looked like he had herpes and so we stopped.
BUT THEN i ended up downtown with one of my friends, although i could never see who it was. we had to fight...
BAHHH it must be the time of year because I legit could not stop myself from looking at my ex’s Myspace (MYSPACE, FOR GOD’S SAKE) and having a gigglefit. Totally inappropriate, but it occurred to me that it was almost 4 years ago that we started dating and now it just seems like I was a wee little baby. I remember calling Hannah on the drive home from our first date and freaking out...
WatchBahhhh this is fabulous.
things that are great to come home to
fridge full of strawberries and raspberries
free water
a surprise paycheck from this summer
reasonable conversations about where my car will be next semester
temporary gym membership
flannel snowflake comforter
family
actual natural landscape
my own room/bathroom
things 2.0
Apparently it is a crime against humanity to sit on the floor of an airport in Russia. People are looking at me like I have “666” tattooed on my head while simultaneously kicking puppies and trash-talking pizza.
Flight delays are the bane of my existence.
I now fully understand why my mom drinks every time she goes to the airport. It is not only an excellent time-waster but also it...
DRUNK DRUNK DRUNK I AM REALLY DRUNK. DRUNK OFF ATTENTION AND VODKA AND LIIIIIIIFE. WHY DID I DECIDE TO LEAVE RUSSIA SO EARLY THERE ARE WARTS ON MY FINGERS I THINK AND I DON’T WANNA GO TO THE DENTIST HO W AM I TYPING ACCURATELY IT’S LIKE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE EVERYTHING IS SIKLLLY.
thing that russia is awesome at:
giving me ample opportunities to slowly kill myself. (and by that i mean cheap cigarettes, cheap alcohol, and tons of alone time)
edit: this is my 666th post. COINCIDENCE??
